At long last, my college years are bringing to me the classes I have been waiting for....well, some of them. In due time, there will be more. I suppose that what I am really excited about is that for once, I can use my creativity. This isn't to say that I never did before (we all have to be creative with most of the homework given to us), but it's English this time. It's poetry. It's stories. It's life on a whole new level.
But I'm not really here to talk about my college career. That could get pretty boring, I think. We all know the deal. We've got to get good grades, show up to class everyday, eat enough food and exercise frequently. No, what I'm here for in this moment is to relate a story that happened yesterday, something that both hurt and confessed some truth.
I got up Monday morning and thought that I would try something different. I had thought about it over the weekend and came to terms that it wouldn't hurt to give it a go. Not only was I going to dress a little cute (as in, I put more effort into it), but I was going to apply a bit of makeup to my face. Boom. I know. It's shocking if you know me. It wasn't anything entirely drastic. I played with the eyes mostly, using some eye liner and eye shadow. I tried some fancy lip gloss too as an after touch.
So there I was, staring at the stranger looking back at me in the mirror. That looks nothing like me, I thought, but nevertheless proceeded in gathering my books and slinging the backpack on me, I headed out the door.
Now, there can only be a few assumptions on my part with the next statement I'll make. I like to observe people (don't judge me, because people-watching isn't always creepy), so when I say that people were looking differently at me, that's just what I thought was the case by looking at their expressions. These were just people I didn't know as well, so I couldn't make any statistics from this. Later on when I went to lunch, I bumped into a girl that has been in a few of my classes. We said hello and all that polite talk, when before I left, she stated ecstatically "You look really nice today!" I said thanks and walked away, but this one little comment got me thinking for the rest of the day. There was a part of me that enjoyed the compliment, but another part that made me feel upset the rest of the day. It didn't help that I had to go to a night class and take a test. I was better by the time I could go back to the room and relax.
So what was my observation from all this? It's a very easy one and rather common, but it still makes me mad when I contemplate it. When I wore makeup, I was suddenly termed pretty. Sure, I've gotten compliments on clothes and what not, but what about the natural beauty? Just so you all know, this doesn't change who I am. I'm not going to start wearing makeup everyday just to impress everyone, but the standard of beauty is sadly lowered from what it was a long time ago. I think I'm beautiful without having to 'make' myself that. I am that.
It's just a shame that there are still lots of people who try too hard.
